Hello dear ones. How are you? I’ve noticed that as we continue with the pandemic around the world, and the delta variant is present, I’m feeling all the effects of the heaviness of the world. Layer on top of that my own personal health issues, my older son breaking a bone in his foot a few weeks ago, and my younger son needing to be taken to get stitches this week, it’s been a heck of a lot of emotions to process.
What I noticed was the night after returning from the emergency room with my younger son, I was having nightmares about COVID because there were so many people there complaining of symptoms, and my son is 10 and unvaccinated. I tried all of my usual tricks to calm my body, and go to sleep. My body was having none of it. I was agitated and annoyed. I could tell there were emotions there that I was pushing away and not attending to. After two hours, I finally got up, went and did a bit of yoga, and had a good hard cry. It was only then that I could settle down and read a little bit of a book that soothed my soul. The book is called “When you are Falling Dive” by Cheri Huber, and it was just what I needed to read.
It reminded me that what I was feeling was resistance. I was resisting the reality of the moment. Yes, my son was injured and had stitches and may have been exposed to covid. I was resisting feeling my feelings. I was resisting the anger and sadness that were present. I didn’t take time to process the emotions from my son being hurt and having to rush him to the ER.
It was several hours later, and there was nothing I could do about what had transpired that evening. And even if I could, I couldn’t do anything at 3 am, yet, there I was, suffering over something that had already happened, as well as something that may or may not happen.
When I was reminded of the resistance, then I turned my attention to acceptance that yes, all of this was happening. Did I like it? No! When I just noticed that it was happening, then I could notice all of the underlying emotions that went with the resistance: All of the sadness, overwhelm, and even anger that was there. I took time to allow those emotions and notice where I felt them in the body. I cried- really hard. After I spent some time with my emotions, the resistance started melting away and I could see that underneath the resistance was peace and calm, just waiting for me.
In that moment, I was reminded that wherever there is resistance in my life, there is a real change that is ready to take place. The resistance is actually pointing to the place of potential transformation. Many of my clients come to me wanting to feel better but they are resistant to making any nutritional changes. The magic comes when they accept what is happening and that they can just try something that may or may not work, but at least they could try. This is where the magic happens. Ok, I see huge resistance and I’m going to try anyway. I accept that I’m resisting, and here we go.
So how do you stop resisting? Awareness and noticing. Maybe throw in a dash of curiosity too. Notice what is really happening- no you don’t have to like it. No you don’t have to embrace it wholeheartedly. And then see if you can open up just a little to accepting that the thing that you don’t want and are pushing so hard against, how it IS actually happening. Just accept that it is. See if you can bring some compassion to that part of you that is struggling so much with how challenging it is, and perhaps see how you can support yourself during this difficult time.
That’s the big secret and it’s counter-intuitive. We think that if we accept something that it means it will stay, but the opposite is true. Resistance is what keeps something in place- the old saying is “what we resist, persists”. Resistance never changes anything. Acceptance is what leads to change.
Where are you resisting in your life? Are you resisting exercise or meal planning? Or maybe it’s just taking a nap when you are tired? Bring your awareness to it- watch how you resist. Feel it in your body. Then bring as much compassion and acceptance as possible to it and see how it shifts.
Ok dear ones. I hope you see all the places where resistance is keeping you stuck in your life. Thank you so much for listening. I’m seeing all of you in your own divine light. Take good care of yourself.
This may seem like a strange topic, but it’s really what most of us spend our lives doing. We swim around in the sea of suffering. It’s all around us and we don’t even know that we are in it because we think that that’s all there is. Just misery.
In Buddhism, the saying is that pain is inevitable, AND suffering is optional. What if there was a way to stop that suffering?
It’s all about turning your attention to the present, not what that critical voice in the head is saying. First bringing awareness to what that critical voice is saying, then you can practice turning your attention away from that voice and towards what you know to be true.
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